by Russ Linden
In the 2019 MFLN Virtual Conference Relationships for Readiness, I used some polls in my presentation on Collaboration across Boundaries. One of them asked participants to assess themselves on the 5 characteristics of effective collaborative leaders: Which of these characteristics are strengths?
Here are the results (participants could select more than one):
Listen carefully to understand others’ perspectives: 66%
Thinks systemically: connect initiative to a larger purpose: 55%
Have great determination, resolve: keep ego in check: 50%
Look for win-win possibilities: 37%
Use more “pull” than “push”: 24%
As you can see, participants rated themselves lowest on seeking win-win possibilities and using “pull” more than “push.” Push is using the formal authority of our position. Pull involves tapping something internal in others – a value, a goal, a source of motivation. And win-win possibilities – solutions that benefit both (or all) parties – are possible when people don’t assume that life is a “zero-sum game;” that your gain must be at my loss.
The poll results are consistent with my experience in working with government and nonprofit leaders and managers for over 35 years. There are good reasons why these two factors are difficult for most. One of the biggest factors that limit win-win thinking is that people must first believe that collaboration can be in everyone’s interest. But we Americans tend to be very competitive people; according to some studies we’re the 5th most litigious country in the world, and most people see competition as a win-lose game.
And why is it that most of us don’t see “pull” as a strength? Several reasons. We’re more familiar with push. Push is quicker (though not usually as effective). Pull is more indirect, and it requires knowing what motivates others, so it can involve a lot of trial and error.
Given these “speed bumps,” how can we improve our use of these two key collaborative leadership skills? It may be easier than you think. After all, both pull and win-win have something in common: they both require knowing the other person or group’s values, motivations, and interests. And here’s the good news: as our poll shows, most of us think we’re good at understanding other people’s perspectives. In fact, it was the most cited strength among our webinar participants. So we can use a proven strategy for making a change: use a strength to address a weakness.
Here are some examples of using a strength – understanding others’ perspectives – to employ pull and win-win solutions:
• Ask certain questions that give you a clue as to your colleagues’ values, goals and sources of motivation. Questions like, which work activities do you find most meaningful? Which give you energy? I sometimes ask my clients, “When are you at your best at work?”
• When Steve Jobs was looking for an experienced executive to become Apple’s CEO in 1983, he started courting John Sculley from Pepsi. Sculley kept saying he was happy where he was. Nothing Jobs said could change his mind. Finally Jobs made a different pitch; he asked Sculley, “Do you want to spend the rest of your life selling sugar water to teens, or do you want to come to Apple and help us change the world?” That hooked Sculley, and he made the change.
• The HR director at a large university was known for his ability to hire and retain very competent staff. I interviewed most of his 10 senior staff to learn how he managed to keep them for long periods of time. They all said the same thing; he made them feel “special.” How did he do that? They reported that the director was an excellent observer and listener, and over time he discovered talents in each one, sometimes talents that they didn’t see in themselves. He told each what he saw in them. He gave them expanded opportunities to use those strengths, even in ways that weren’t part of their job description. They learned, they grew, and they thrived in that environment.
• I’ve used a variation of the HR director’s approach while facilitating collaborative teams. If certain team members aren’t very active in the group’s discussions, or seem to be displeased with the team’s functioning, I sometimes talk with them between meetings. I’ll mention something positive they’ve said or done, and that I think they can contribute a lot to our success. Then I ask how they think the team is doing and what the team needs to do to improve. Usually they open up, and identify something that’s bothering them about the team. Then I ask if they can use some of their strengths to help the team succeed. It often works well. It pulls them in, and everyone wins.
Using pull and seeking win-win solutions takes time. It requires us to think from the other’s point of view. It’s easier and quicker to use “push,” easier to focus only on what we need. With push we can get compliance, but using pull and finding win-win approaches usually results in commitment. And there’s a world of difference between the two.
To learn more about what it means to have a collaborative mindset and identify six key factors for putting that mindset into practice view the archived MFLN 2019 Virtual Conference session Collaboration across Boundaries.
Russ Linden is a management educator specializing in organizational performance and change in the public and nonprofit sectors. He has taught at the University of Virginia, Federal Executive Institute and University of Connecticut. His latest book, Leading Across Boundaries, deals with the leader’s role in developing collaborative networks and cultures.